How Thinking Traps Affect You and How To Overcome Them

What are Thinking Traps and Why do you Need to be Aware of them

Thinking traps are inauthentic thought patterns that negatively affect our mood and behavior. In other words, they are not based on facts or reality. Rather, they are our mind’s perceived delusions and fears.

In truth, everyone is susceptible to thinking traps and often we don’t realize when we have fallen victim to them. So, being aware of them will help you dispel unhealthy thought patterns. As a result, you will reduce stress, safeguard your mental health, and achieve clarity and peace of mind.

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The 12 Thinking Traps

Here are the 12 thinking traps taught in cognitive behavior therapy. I would like to share them so you can recognize when they occur and disregard them as illusory.
Which of these most resonates with you?

1. All-or-nothing thinking:

Seeing things in extremes, as if they are all right or all wrong, all good or all bad. Thus, there is no room for a middle ground in evaluating yourself or others. For example, “I’m no good, I’ve made a complete mess of things”

2. Overgeneralization:

Drawing overly broad conclusions from one example. For instance, making one mistake and then thinking “I never do anything right.”

3. Mental filter:

Paying attention to only the bad, so that nothing else is noticed. To clarify, receiving several compliments on a presentation, but believing you did a bad job because one person looked bored.

4. Discounting the positives:

Noticing the good, but thinking that it doesn’t count or isn’t real. For example, believing that someone was nice to you because they felt sorry for you.

5. Mind-reading:

Assuming you know what others are thinking with little or no evidence and that their actions are about you, even if there is no indication that’s true. To explain, assuming someone doesn’t like you or is talking badly about you, even though you don’t have any proof.

6. Fortune-telling:

Predicting the future with little or no evidence. In other words, assuming you know for certain what will happen (ie. I know I am never going to get better, or I know I’m going to mess up)

7. Catastrophizing:

Assuming the worst-case scenario is going to happen. For example, assuming you will be fired from your job for making a mistake.

8. Magnification:

Blowing things out of proportion. Making a small problem into a big one. An example of this would be, receiving a short reply to a message and automatically thinking “why did I say that? I’ve ruined everything! She doesn’t want to talk to me anymore.”

9. Emotional Reasoning:

Confusing feelings with facts. For example, assuming your situation is hopeless because you feel hopeless. Or assuming your partner is unfaithful because you feel jealous.

10. Shoulds and musts:

Applying rigid, inflexible rules and expectations to yourself and others. For instance, she should be cooking, or I should be working out, or I must not cry.

11. Labeling:

This involves describing yourself or others with labels such as “I am selfish”, “I am a loser”, “I am stupid” etc.

12. Personalization and Blame:

Blaming yourself or others totally for things that go wrong. Seeing yourself or another as the cause of bad events even when things are not in anyone’s control. To illustrate this, “if something goes wrong with my pregnancy, it will all be my fault”

How to Overcome and Dispel Thinking Traps

1. Be Mindful

Become aware of any thinking traps in your mind and acknowledge them without judgment. Additionally, notice which thinking traps you are most vulnerable to and become conscious of your mind’s tendencies.

For example, people with social anxiety often fall into the thinking trap of mind-reading. Likewise, notice patterns in your speech since what you say reflects what you think.

Your awareness will help you dispel them by seeing they are not authentic. My common thinking traps are #4, #5, and #7. By knowing this, I can identify when they occur and balance my mind.

2. Challenge your Distorted Thoughts

Ask yourself: What is the evidence that supports this thought? Does this thought bring me peace? Remember, thoughts are not facts but when you think and feel something, you make it true to you but not necessarily to reality.

So, judge your thoughts fairly and do not uphold them if they cause you to suffer. This will guide you and help you to find your center.

3. Letting go of unhelpful thoughts

With mindfulness, you may notice some reoccurring thoughts that come up even after you have challenged your thinking. Regardless, once you have identified a thinking trap and challenged your thoughts, the goal is to be free. Consequently, if the thought persists, it is because of your belief in it.

Here are two ways that make letting go easier:

1. Sing the thought to a silly tune (ie. Happy Birthday, Mary had a Little Lamb, or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star).
   Imagine singing this thought to the tune of Happy Birthday: “Everybody hates me, I’ve ruined everything, everybody hates me, I’ve ruined everything.“
   
2. Imagine a salesperson showing up at your door trying to sell you this thought.
   Using the above thought, imagine what this would sound like. “Hi there, I have a thought I’d like to sell you. It will make you dislike yourself. In fact, many of our customers report experiencing depression after purchasing this thought.”

Both tactics will help you to stop taking your thoughts seriously. Thus, you are less likely to believe them and to hold onto them.

Your True Nature and the Nature of Thoughts are Not the Same

You are not your thoughts. In fact, the mental chatter that you hear, and the physical sensations and emotions that you feel, happen automatically. Just as objects appear in your field of awareness, like the sky, the trees, and the things around you, so do your thoughts and feelings.

For example, the mind may say “I am a loser” or comment “what should I eat today”, but these thoughts are not who you are. Nor are you creating them because they are occurring by themselves.

In other words, who you are is the one that perceives thought. Additionally, the essence of thoughts and feelings is transient; they appear and disappear, and never stay.

You precede all thoughts, and your silent and still nature is the place where they arise from and return to when they dissolve.

This knowledge is freedom and from it comes a deep peace. Until this recognition becomes firm, challenging your thinking will help you see beyond your illusions.

Freedom and Clarity

Most of our thinking is frivolous and distracts us from our inherent peace because they come from the ego.

When you become aware of this, you will gain clarity and rise above mental distortions. Furthermore, you will grow in strength and your heart and mind will expand.

So, take a moment to look around and just breathe. Let things be exactly as you find them without interpreting, labeling, and judging them.

Reality is not in perception, and when you let go of your thoughts and bask in silence; love, peace, and beauty will stand before you.

May you be happy and well.

With endless love,

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Read the Perils of the Unobserved Mind next.